Sitting at the Dublin gate for my flight to Toronto,  I felt a struggle building deep inside. Well maybe struggle isn’t quite the right word…it was more like melancholy I suppose. Maybe it was that I missed my kids dearly and was excited to share all my stories with them, but I felt like I still had one foot on my bike peg. The other foot was itching too, but of course I missed my kids!

My kids are the sunshine of my days and the starlight of my nights, and I couldn’t wait to wrap my arms around them again. But this journey has opened my eyes to how much I have neglected myself and I didn’t feel ready for it to end.

Over the intercom I hear “Calling Sarah Kane Deville to gate 304. Last call for passengaer Sarah Deville”. I wonder where she is, I thought. Will she come racing around the corner with a frntic look? Will she walk sadly toward the gate checking her boarding pass? Will she even make it? I wonder also if perhaps she isn’t coming at all. Has she fallen in love with Ireland? Has she decided to Stay? Will anyone miss her if she doesn’t get on that plane?

And then I wonder if they’ll be calling my name next.

I wrote this August 8, 2016 while sitting at my gate, but only rediscovered my notebook today, nearly nine years later!